My Story.

I was not born into spirituality.
Nothing I was looking for. It found me.

I was just a regular guy trying to figure life out. As a child, I felt alive, curious, and full of energy. On the surface, many things looked normal.

But growing up, I lived in constant emotional tension between my parents. In ways I felt loved and safe. But deep down, I rarely felt truly seen. I often felt misunderstood. Like something about me was wrong.

Over time, that feeling shaped me.
The feeling I had about myself, who I was.

Much of what I carried into adult life was unconscious. Patterns. Beliefs. Reactions. Emotional confusion.
Things I repeated without even noticing.

As I got older, I started searching for something. I could not fully understand what I was searching for.
I had a dark cloud inside of me, an emptyness that was hard to fill. And I did not know where to look.

I know now that what I was looking for was: Self love, peace, freedom, meaning, relief.

I looked for it outside myself.

In adrenaline.
In achievement.
In distraction.
In alcohol abuse.

For many years, alcohol became my way of handling my reality. It helped me relax and slowing down.
Helped me escape myself for a moment. It felt like relief.

From the outside, my adult life looked great. I built a career in advertising. Started my own business as
a advertising photographer and became successful: Picture Perfect.
Built a family. Became a father. But inside, I still felt lost and disconnected.

I worked hard.
Pushed hard.
Escaped hard.

Eventually, I reached a point where I found myself depressed and I knew something had to change.

Then psychedelics entered my life.

My first ever experience with any substance except alcohol was Ayahuasca at a retreat abroad.
It was incredible in so many ways, beautiful and brutal at the same time.
(This is not the substance I would recommend as a first experience.)

The substance I work with in Amsterdam is Psilocybin, a much more gentle version of something similar.

That first psychedelic experience changed everything. For the first time, I truly saw myself, the real me.

Not the identity I had built.
Not the roles I played.
Not the masks I had put on myself.

Just me.

I saw a lot of my patterns clearly. I saw the pain I had carried. I saw how much of what I believed about myself was conditioning and not my own judgements, thoughts and beliefs of how things should be. How to live my life.

I realized, just because something feels familiar does not mean it is true. We can live inside patterns for so long that they start feeling like the only reality. But they are still just patterns. And patterns can change.

Awareness changes everything.

Psychedlics’s was the beginning of a completely new chapter.

My relationship to myself.
My body.
My habits.
My mind.
My awareness.

I became deeply committed to understanding myself. Through inner work, meditation, breathwork,
spiritual practice and deep reflection, I slowly reconnected with something I had lost.

Presence.
Truth.
Inner freedom.

I my country we are not allowed to use psychedelics so meditation and breathwork became my way of “connecting“.

As I started speaking openly about my psychedelic journey’s and how I see things from my new perspectives,
something unexpected happened. People began finding me and reach out.

They opened up. Shared things they had never shared before. And I realized something.

I have a natural ability to meet people where they are. With no judgement.
To listen deeply. To see what may be difficult for them to see on their own. Not by telling them who they should be.
But by helping them see more clearly who they already are beneath the mask they wear.

This is why I do this work.

Because I know what it feels like to feel disconnected from yourself.
And I know what becomes possible when that connection returns.

Life will always bring challenges. It’s the way it is. But your relationship to life can completely change and transform.
When awareness grows, suffering changes as well. It becomes lighter.

What you can see, you can transform. Life is to short not to be lived and experienced fully.

I believe deeply in human potential. I believe we are far less stuck than we think.
Sometimes, we are just one honest moment away from a completely different life.

If something in my story resonates with you, reach out.
I would be honored to connect and see how I might help you.